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What
to do?
My girlfriend of 2 and a half year, and I have been talking about
trying a threesome to see what it would be like. I have had a male
experience before but my girlfriend is curious about what it would
be like to hook up with another girl. My question is, do you think
that if we introduced another male or female into our sex life even
if it were just once ot try it out do you think it would cause
problems?
Kay
Says:
Well Joe I would suggest that you talk this through in great detail
with
your girlfriend and as you have been together for quite some time
now
this should not be a problem for you. As long as the two of you
will be
comfortable with this idea then I do not see why it should cause
any
problems. However, if the person is a friend the situation may turn
out
to be awkward and unfriendly afterwards. This should also be talked
about with the three of you.
Jealous
I recently met my girlfriend for a date at a club where she and
her friend decided to meet me. When I arrived, I saw her
flirting with one of the security guards who was kissing her
hand. I was so angry! Am I wrong for being angry?
~Bob
Kay
says:
Dear Bob,
You are not wrong for being angry. These are your feelings and you
are entitled to them. However, if you approached your
girlfriend while being angry, you probably got defensiveness and
anger in return - without resolving anything. I don't know
whether she was flirting or not, or whether it was innocent or
malicious. I do know that you need to find out. And the best way
to find out is to ask in a calm, non-threatening manner and be willing
to listen. Good luck.
Boyfriend
slept with friend
I
went home last weekend and while I was away my boyfriend cheated
on me with my best friend. They both put it down to being drunk
and I have tried to accept this but am finding it very difficult.
I love them both and can not understand why they did this to me.
I want to put this behind us but when we're all together I can't
stop thinking about what they have done.
Kay says:
Do not accept the drunkenness as an excuse for what they have
done. I think you should talk to the both of them separately and
explain how you feel. The fact that your boyfriend has been unfaithful
suggests that he may have some sort of problem with your relationship.
You will need to talk this through with him. As for your best friend...I
suggest you let your true feelings be know.
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Lonely
Since I have started at university, I have been unable to make friends,
that seem to like me and understand me. I want to find friends to
go
out drinking with but everyone else has there own group. What do
I do?
Kay
says:
You could start with your class mates.
You have something in common with
them as they are doing the same course. I suggest you go to someone
who looks friendly and say something - anything. Should it be "What
is the time?" or "Oh I don't like this class the lecturer
is boring". Don't be afraid and if they are friendly enough
you will easily strike up a conversation. If a conversation does
start ask if you can sit with them. The best time to do something
like this is at the start of the class when waiting to get into
whatever room you are in. Failing that you could join a club at
the Union. To do this get in touch with Laura
Neave or click on "Clubs
& Societies" right here at AbertayUnion.com. If that
still doesn't work go to the union and start talking with someone
there you never know your luck! The best thing to do is be yourself
and keep trying, because eventually someone will appreciate you.
U
R Not Alone (Shy Guy Says:)
I would just like to reassure "Lonely" that he/she
are not alone in finding it difficult to mix and meet new friends
at
uni. I am painfully shy aswell and the thought of talking to starngers
and group work terrifies me. This won't solve your problem, but
I hope
you dont feel so alone now.
Avoided...
What is the best way to handle someone who is obviously angry,
using very negative body language and refusing to interact? They
won't return a hello or will walk away when I ask if I have done
something to upset them.
~Anonymous
Kay
says:
Dear Anonymous,
I don't think there is much more you can do when someone is
angry. You can inquire about what you have done; perhaps offer an
apology ahead of time for any harm you might have caused. Then you
have to let go, move on, and hope the person comes to his/her senses
and decides to talk.
Is
he gay?
My boyfriend has recently
suggested having a threesome with me and one of his male friends.
He appears very keen and sometimes I think he is a little too keen.
Do you think my boyfriend is gay? This is really worrying me.
Kay says:
Personally, I do
not think your boyfriend is gay. One reason why he may appear keen
is because he wants to explore sexually. He may be looking for different
ways to make your sex life together more enjoyable. If you feel
that your relationship with your boyfriend is strong enough and
the three of you are going to be comfortable with this situation
then why not? If your relationship is not so serious, then I would
not go through with it. You have to be prepared for the consequences
that may be a result of this. You could be treading on thin ice!
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